[That's the part Angel hasn't said out loud, how the violence and the drugs and the sex and the fame were all the same, in the end. He was (is, will be) addicted to each one in it's own awful, thorny, impossible-to-escape way.
Maybe he already knows Velvet's the same. Maybe that's why one hand stays, moving her hair out of her face.]
Yeah, sure. I mean, my old man was a mafia enforcer who worked his way up the crime ladder, but I tried to go straight, for a lil bit. When I was...I dunno, seventeen, eighteen, somethin'. I tried livin' regular.
Hey, ain't a damn thing wrong with bein' a dentist!
[But he snorts a little as he says it, flashing those all-white teeth, missing that glint of gold that catches the light, that marks him as different.]
Besides, it was mostly my pops who did it. Him and my big brother. Molly n' me, we tried to do other stuff. Real disappointment to dear ol' dad. [No mention of his mother, where she was, the role she played -- or didn't, as it were, those memories buried deeper than the ones of his siblings.]
[Angel huffs out a little laugh as Velvet scoots over, as she tucks into his shoulder and lets out her litany of complaints. Then he's reaching out, both sets of arms draping over her, tugging her into a proper cuddle situation.]
Yeah, go on, Vel. [There's a touch of amusement, of sadness, of each.] It fuckin' sucks. You ain't wrong.
[Even if the delivery is pouty, childish, the fear at it's core is one Angel knows way too fucking well: what if I'm not good enough? The feeling of it, of being famous and talented and desired, of being wanted is just as addictive as the damn drugs.]
Let it out, cause I ain't gonna make fun'a you for whinin' for a whole five minutes. So get it outta your system, before I make ya put on your big girl pants and keep doin' the shitty stuff.
[Velvet lets out a tearful laugh, one that sounds halfway toward a growl— but she can't be angry enough right now. There's too many different emotions happening at once to take out her anger on Angel, and instead she just laughs, and laughs.]
Shut up! You're the worst.
[Velvet, who has always been the older sister in the equation, has rarely really let down her guard enough to let Veneer support her in the way he eagerly would if Velvet would ever count on him emotionally. She's prided herself in it, too— being Veneer's older sister has been her identity her whole life.
But in this moment, for five minutes, Velvet is the younger one, the smaller one, the one not in charge, and there isn't much choice otherwise.]
I hate doing the shitty stuff. Being an adult is the worst.
Being a kid is the worst?
Being is the worst! It's never good enough!
[And as if she doesn't know how to cry, that wicked, tearful laughter continues, like she can't believe how pathetic she's being.]
[Another one of those hands, there are so many of them and they're all gentle, all careful, smooths over Velvet's hair. Tucks the little wispy bits back in place, guides curls back together, an absent, soothing motion.]
You could if you wanna. Cry. [There's a laugh, more hair-petting. He hugs her a little closer.] Five minutes. You can do anything you wanna. It won't even count.
Be a stupid, dumb, shitty little kid for a sec, Vel. I won't tell nobody.
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Date: 2024-06-21 01:16 am (UTC)Maybe he already knows Velvet's the same. Maybe that's why one hand stays, moving her hair out of her face.]
Yeah, sure. I mean, my old man was a mafia enforcer who worked his way up the crime ladder, but I tried to go straight, for a lil bit. When I was...I dunno, seventeen, eighteen, somethin'. I tried livin' regular.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-21 01:18 am (UTC)Velvet just bats those big ol eyes a couple times.]
I feel like you've skipped that detail up until now?
The mafia bit.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-22 02:21 am (UTC)Then:] Ohhhhhhhh, right. Yeah, big crime family. They got the mafia in noodleland?
no subject
Date: 2024-06-22 03:55 am (UTC)There was always something cool about you. Your parents did crime.
My parents were dentists.
We are not the same.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-23 01:14 am (UTC)[But he snorts a little as he says it, flashing those all-white teeth, missing that glint of gold that catches the light, that marks him as different.]
Besides, it was mostly my pops who did it. Him and my big brother. Molly n' me, we tried to do other stuff. Real disappointment to dear ol' dad. [No mention of his mother, where she was, the role she played -- or didn't, as it were, those memories buried deeper than the ones of his siblings.]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-23 08:42 am (UTC)It's not like it matters for either of us. No one back home cares if your parents aren't famous.
[Velvet pouts even harder somehow, scrunching closer to Angel and resting her forehead against his shoulder, cheek pressed still against the bed.]
I don't wanna work,
[she complains, childish again.]
I don't want stupid responsibilities, and I don't want to fail.
I just got started figuring out what I want for myself and now I keep having to do— other stupid stuff!
And I'm bad at it! I don't want to be bad at stuff, Angel, I want to be perfect!
[She gives a pathetic whine, and then;]
I deserve to be perfect.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-24 01:39 am (UTC)Yeah, go on, Vel. [There's a touch of amusement, of sadness, of each.] It fuckin' sucks. You ain't wrong.
[Even if the delivery is pouty, childish, the fear at it's core is one Angel knows way too fucking well: what if I'm not good enough? The feeling of it, of being famous and talented and desired, of being wanted is just as addictive as the damn drugs.]
Let it out, cause I ain't gonna make fun'a you for whinin' for a whole five minutes. So get it outta your system, before I make ya put on your big girl pants and keep doin' the shitty stuff.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-24 02:19 am (UTC)Shut up! You're the worst.
[Velvet, who has always been the older sister in the equation, has rarely really let down her guard enough to let Veneer support her in the way he eagerly would if Velvet would ever count on him emotionally. She's prided herself in it, too— being Veneer's older sister has been her identity her whole life.
But in this moment, for five minutes, Velvet is the younger one, the smaller one, the one not in charge, and there isn't much choice otherwise.]
I hate doing the shitty stuff. Being an adult is the worst.
Being a kid is the worst?
Being is the worst! It's never good enough!
[And as if she doesn't know how to cry, that wicked, tearful laughter continues, like she can't believe how pathetic she's being.]
This isn't fair. I don't cry.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-26 01:57 am (UTC)You could if you wanna. Cry. [There's a laugh, more hair-petting. He hugs her a little closer.] Five minutes. You can do anything you wanna. It won't even count.
Be a stupid, dumb, shitty little kid for a sec, Vel. I won't tell nobody.
no subject
Date: 2024-07-02 03:20 am (UTC)Sure you won't—
[She sobs]
Cos I'll kill you if you do.
[There's so little bite to it, really. She lets herself cry, though, for once taking refuge in someone else's presence.]